Allie. Chapter 19. Reader Immersion.

Allie’s mind swam, struggling to make sense of her surroundings. Panic rose up within her as she realized she couldn’t open her eyes. Then the pain kicked in.

She let out a whimper as a burning sensation threatened to overwhelm her. Images flashed through her mind as she drifted in and out of consciousness, her body on fire until finally, mercifully, the pain subsided, giving way to fitful sleep.

“You think she knew?” Frank asked as he threw Allie over his shoulder.

Serenity didn’t answer as she commanded her dragons to heel. She no longer knew what to make of the girl. They were currently alone in a field, the city a distant dot on the horizon. Serenity didn’t want any witnesses. 

“Leave us,” she said, gesturing toward the grass. 

Frank grimaced, but did as he was told, laying Allie gently on the ground. 

“I’ll call you when we’re done,” she said, dismissing him. 

Frank nodded, walking as far as he dared while still within ear-shot

Serenity examined Allie as she lay fast asleep in the grass. The hole in her chest had already completely healed, though her dress had been ruined. 

With a sigh, Serenity commanded Kal, her oldest dragon, to lift Allie in the air. Following her instructions, Kal lightly gripped Allie’s feet between his teeth and lifted her into the air so that she was dangling upside down in front of Serenity.

Moments later, Allie’s eyes fluttered open as she regained consciousness. 

“Good morning, daughter,” Serenity said, smiling politely. 

“Wha…” Allie replied, still groggy and confused. 

“And what a good morning it is to be alive,” Serenity continued, overly cheery. “In spite of everything, I am happy that you’re alive.”

Understanding began to dawn on Allie’s face. “The fight…”

“You took quite a wound in the city,” Serenity said. “A mortal wound to most.”

Allie blinked, spinning slight in Kal’s jaws. “Something hit my chest.”

“A big chunk of stone,” Serenity supplied, nodding. “It caved in your chest. And yet… here you are.”

“How?”

Serenity peered into Allie’s eyes, scrutinizing the girl behind them. “You know how.”

“I’m…”

“You’re Immortal,” Serenity finished for Allie, watching her for a reaction. 

Allie seemed completely stunned, her eyes wide as she mouthed the words over and over again. 

“I’m curious,” Serenity said. “Did you really not know? Surely something in your past would have indicated…”

Allie shook her head, looking pale with sickness. “Can you let me down please?”

“Can’t do that,” said Serenity. “We have matters to discuss.”

Allie blinked rapidly, trying to keep focused despite the rush of blood to her head. 

“When did you first learn who you were?” Serenity asked, tense with anticipation. 

“I didn’t know,” Allie said, her voice strained.

“Which faction are you with?” Serenity asked, grinding her teeth. 

“Of Immortals?” Allie asked. “I didn’t know there were factions.”

Serenity studied Allie’s face before finally turning away, pacing back and forth in front of her. 

“There are only two,” she eventually said, a distant expression on her face. “My faction is scattered, using our powers to deliver justice to cities around the World.”

“I’m not with any faction,” Allie said.

“The other faction wages war against us,” Serenity continued, “so they alone can rule as they see fit, abusing their powers over everyone else.”

“I’m just a girl,” Allie cried, waving her arms. “I’m not with anybody and I know absolutely nothing. I just want to be free.”

“No,” Serenity chided, “you’re not just a girl. Not anymore. You’re important.”

“Immortal or not, I’m not important. I don’t want to pick sides.”

Serenity shook her head, a deep frown creasing her face. “It doesn’t matter what you want. What you do from here-on-out is important. If you run from this, you will be declaring yourself an enemy of justice and I will treat you as such. So this is your choice, Allie. Justice or war?”

Allie ground her teeth, feeling trapped in a corner. She found herself struggling to meet Serenity’s eyes as she slowly nodded. “I’ll join you.”

Suddenly, Kal dropped Allie on her head. She collapsed in the grass in a heap as her body readjusted to being right-side-up.

“Good,” Serenity said cheerfully. “Now run and fetch Frank for me, will you? It’s time to move to the next city.”


I’ve mentioned before about Tropes. for those of you who haven’t, Tropes are basically storytelling cliches that are used constantly in stories. The thing is, Tropes are Tropes for good reason. the key is understanding the reason behind the Trope rathe than blindly following it. 

In this chapter, I want to talk about the Trope of: 

“Wow! My seemingly unimportant main character turned out to be important all along! And they’re powerful! What are the chances?”

Turns out… pretty good.

Now, to be honest, I didn’t decide that Allie would be Immortal until a few Chapters ago. She didn’t have to be Immortal to be important, but I wanted her to be for one huge reason: Reader Immersion.

It’s all well and good to show off some fantastical aspect to your World: These people are Immortal, isn’t that cool??

But if you want the magic to feel real, you have to immerse the reader in it.

This means your main character, the one that’s feeling and experiencing the World for your reader, must feel and experience the magic. This, on a basic level, is accomplished through Draco being Immortal. And it’s because he’s Immortal that I didn’t HAVE to have Allie be Immortal as well. But she IS Immortal. Why?

Because Draco has been Immortal for a very very long time. Nothing is new to him. He isn’t surprised by anything. So, while experiencing the World through can still be fun, it’s missing something important… WONDER!

Allie has just discovered her powers. This means we get to explore the extent of her magic with her. That makes a huge difference in our experience as a reader. Suddenly there’s a sense of wonder involved when we read about the magic and we can get organic answers to the natural questions involved with the magic.

So don’t be afraid of making your main character important. The reader experiences what your characters experience. So why not include a little wonder?

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